Well I'm not gonna force you to read my blog, but if you should happen to stumble upon it, take the time to sift through it as it may prove to be of some relevance to you. God forbid, you may actually enjoy it and you would wish to click the button which would mean you were eternally my follower. There isn't really any sort of meaning or specific task that this blog sets out to fulfil, think of it as bohemian.

Thursday, 10 December 2009

There's no reason.

Again I'm back to the first step. This feeling is all too familiar, clutching my mind and body an a ice-cold grip. Tearing the essence of life out of my heart. The remaining fibres of my stability are being stretched and manipulated into a shape I don't recognise as my own.

This isn't me anymore. And I don't want to live if that's what I become. I've had enough of living a life for multiple people. I wish I could just have a moment for me to be how I used to. I haven't felt human for years now, and I miss the life I used to have. So simple and unaware of everything. But I've been toughened up and I've had my skin grazed and my soul cut over the years. Its turned me into a nightmare.

I mean it. I always do. So I'm really scared right now, and I don't want this for me, but unfortunately I've come so close to it before that it could take so little for me to just step off and fall.

Or maybe I'd fly.

Excuse me while I cry.

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